Zee Avi - Book of Morris Johnson

Kinda put me in a better mood on the drive home.

Oh yes, I drove today..but just because I had to go to help in the set up of a company event.

The Public Transport Commute Challenge!

Why I Am Doing This

I have been toying with the idea for a while already....especially most since my car is stuck one of the many thousands condemned to a snail's pace along AYE every morning, and having to pay the dreaded the ERP despite burning fuel (and $$$$) with the obnoxious amount of time contributing to the greenhouse effect arising from carbon emission.

And thinking that perhaps if I had taken public transport, I would have hit the office faster (Yes, even though I would rather be somewhere else). With the opening of the Circle line. I was wondering if it is time to make the switch.

Seriously, ever since about 2003/4 after I first bought my Gilera Runner, I had not taken public transport to work or anywhere else in general, unless exceptions, for example, if I had to leave over the weekend for a dive trip from work. Not like some friends who I know, who genuinely like driving or cars per se, having a car to me was just about pure convenience. But I do dig the fact that I get to do whatever I like in the car, be it blasting the songs on the radio, or zombing out in the morning on the way to work. Obviously something that I won't get the chance to on a train. :/

Of course, there is also the cost factor. Driving nowadays are getting so so much more expensive with the ERP sucking up money from guileless drivers. Anyhow, the car ownership framework in Singapore is kinda flawed:-

• If COEs are aimed to control ownership, then why has LTA still allow for new releases of COEs? If new COEs are allowed to be issued, albeit at a slower rate, it is still an increase right?

• Ok..so you decided to allow people to buy cars nonetheless, and decide to deter people from crowding the roads by introducing usage-based charges to to stagger the surge in traffic i.e. the ERP. But..... people still need to go and leave from work at a certain time right? I am sure that the employers wouldn't mind if their employees hit the office earlier..but do the employees then have to choice to leave early? If no, they would have to leave late to miss the ERP charges right? More often than not, they will probably just end up as suckers to be had whenever they drive under the guillotine-like structure after a long day of work, hoping for a hot shower and meal, and some chill out time before hitting the sack.

• Okok..maybe the ERP still doesn't really dis-incentivise people to change their driving habits. How about making it really cheap for people to drive during non-peak hours? Ok I must come clean. I am also seriously contemplating if I should convert my car to the revised OPC scheme if this public commute do take off. So I may eventually become part of the guilty crowd of people who leave their cars at home, occupying one precious parking lot; more so now because it is so much cheaper to retain an off-peak car and people want to be free of the awful public transport if they can..and causing the authorities to find ways to accommodate the increase of cars per household in that HDB estate. Just look at the situation of cars who can't find a lot at night and had to park illegally along the kerbs. (Btw I just lost a patch of greenery at the back of my block because they are paving for more packing lots. I'm kinda devastated. )

But..taking the public transport always give me the mental image of a rat race of a humongous proportion. Just image..the MRT door opens and then out pour these many people rushing out from the packed tubes, the whole space thunder with footsteps and these huge surge of human traffic scrambling to take over the escalator wheeling them upwards/downwards. And the cycle continues repeatedly.... Eek.

I had never had to be part of this human rat race because my past jobs didn't require me to report at the usual office hours (actually officially some of them do...but then I believe in flexi-hour - I put in more hours towards the night, but don't expect me to come in super early ...), and obviously I drive..so I never really had to put my EZ link card to much use. Looking back, it had been almost 8 years that I had been driving! If I take public transportation, I wonder if I will suffer from withdrawal symptoms..like will my hands suddenly start twitching to grab the steering wheel or something.

Anyway that was the background rationlisation, which had been bouncing around before I decided to just bite the bullet and start the public commuting TODAY. I am giving myself one month..to see if I succumb to withdrawal symptoms and be sucked back to the car (and swallowing rantings and all about jams, parking, ERPs etc etc..) or survive and blend into the rat race of multitude.

Squeak!

(as for the first day of public transport commute..I kinda survived..kinda..)

In commemoration of that patch of greenery behind my block. You shall be missed dearly whenever I see those OPC cars lined up on the tarmac throughout the days.

五月天 我心尚未崩坏的地方

我想，每个人在人生的某个阶段，想要达到一个目标时，可能会遇到很多外来的势力阻扰。为了心中的原则而努力奋斗，创造自己的理想结果。

在努力争取，奋斗的时候，难免会疲惫，对一些人事物产生失望。当结果和自己预期想象的有太大的差距时，觉得难过沮丧也是理所当然。有可能质疑自己的能力，理念。改变自己的态度，有可能积极向上，也有可能变消极怠慢。

但，我觉得，就算难过失望沮丧，一定要锁住心里那份信念。因为如果连信念都失去的话....

那我 还算是我吗？

守护着心中这片尚未崩坏的地方，这才能对得起自己，问心无愧。

Weekend of Two-s

T'was a good weekend, catching up and spending time with..

- C for brunch at Octa Hotel*. I was more impressed by their whimsical items that they sell (I think I want the wall clock!), rather than their menu. Maybe the idea of hi-tea in a parisian chic cafe would be nicer than brunch, which to me is synonymous with hearty stuff (read: huge toast, blueberry pancakes, egg benedicts, sausages, eggs scrambled/poached....not all at one time of course. I am rattling off the memories of yumminess brunches I have had!). So after we shared one breakfast set, we over to Outback Restaurant for more fulfilling stuff (like fried mushrooms and wings. The satisfaction of oil-laden food sometimes! :p). We talked about nothing in particular, but so much about what are happening around us.

- The Friend. Who finally came back from China after 5 days of being shuttled between cities**. Couldn't really make up our mind where to go, so I decided to try out this new coffee place that I read about at Papa Palheta - Loysel's Toy. Great coffee beside Kallang Riverside Park! Another coffee place other than 40 hands to go to.And ended off the night with Shirlyn and the UnXpected at WalaWala. Always edgier than any other live bands that I have heard in Singapore.Impromptu movie this morning. (I dont think I have ever watched a movie before 3pm =.="), followed by leisurely lunch and massage, which made me feel super sleepy after that session.

And the weekend is over just like that. Before I slip into the typical Monday-blues tirade of whines...I WILL HAVE A GOOD WEEK AHEAD!

Hope this neuro-linguistic self -programming works :/

Anyway, something that Shirlyn and the UnXpected covered on Saturday (I love this band that does so unconventional songs)

*Ooo..I think I am in love with Octa Hotel's main store in Japan!

** And me torn between being determined to lead my own life pretending that it was life as usual, or to acknowledge that maybe things are not as grim as I thought they are.

Post about a nothing Friday

Still icing my left knee, no thanks to that weekend , and another reminder that my muscles are not yet conditioned to such sudden surge in activity.

Have been laying off the runs for 2 weeks, and this morning, couldn't take it anymore and went for a swim at the gym this morning despite the thunderstorm (Well hello Fitness First pool! It has been what..2 months? 3? Thank goodness that the pool was heated up this morning as well)

Followed by a long meeting, quick lunch-in, and then out for a team bonding sort of event.

And the work week is officially over after that.

Feels like its lacking something.

Remembered the talk with the big boss some time back, during which he pointed out something had changed about me, which was something that I keenly felt myself during the last 2 years. Something is not sitting right, and I still feel like I am groping in the dark, searching for that switch to understand something.

"The moment being the best teacher", I have been asking myself sometimes what the current situation is trying to tell me..

Maybe it's trying to tell me to stop fighting, and just move on.

Yeah, maybe I should.

xxxxx

前些日子谈起了happy endings。一面谈，我一面想起我第一次将我觉得自己要的happy ending，告诉另一个人了 - 一个前男友的朋友。有一些人，对别人的感受特别敏感，她因该就是这种人。

“要幸福快乐吧”，我对她说。

她停顿了一下，笑了笑说，“怎么我突然感觉那么大的恐惧感？”

我傻愣了。的确，在讲那句话的时候，虽然是真想要幸福快乐，我的心是发着冷颤，充满抗拒的。那时，感情和生活繁杂颠倒，缠的我透不过气。觉得，幸福快乐，离我遥不可及。

那是三年前的事了。

今天，在微博读到张德芬 在《遇见未知的自己》写的这一句话，又唤起这一段回忆：

"亲爱的，外面没有别人，只有你自己。所有的人事物都是你内在的投射，就像镜子一样反射你的内在。当外境有任何东西触动你的时候，记得，要往内看。看看自己哪个地方的旧伤又被碰触了，看看自己有哪些阴影还没有整理好。不要浪费能量在那些外在的、不可改变、不可抗拒的东西上。”

是该又大扫除一下了。

xxxxx

发完牢骚，心情好多了。

可为盈盈 秘密花园／那个男人

I blogged about a previous song by Kewei before. And here's another one she did with Ein Ein & Alfred. Seriously nice!

方大同 无菇朋友

I was wondering what the hell the song was about, and went to youtube it. Now, I can't listen to the song without picturing the morbidness of the MV :/